Bald Guy Greetings
This Birthday Card is From the Most Thoughtful Person Birthday Card
- Delivery and Returns
Inside reads: "FINALLY, A RANKING ON HOW MUCH PEOPLE CARE ABOUT YOU ON YOUR BIRTHDAY. THE OFFICIAL GUIDE.
THEY SEND YOU A TEXT MESSAGE: They care about you very little. Sorry, but you probably already knew that, right?
THEY WRITE ON YOUR FACEBOOK WALL: They don't really know it's your birthday, Facebook reminded them and it was literally the least they could do.
THEY SEND YOU AN ECARD: They like you, but not enough to spend $3.95 on you. You should re-evaluate this relationship.
THEY CALL YOU: At 7:00AM- It's nice that they want to be the first to call, but they clearly don't respect your sleep. At 11:59 PM- They forgot your birthday. This is a guilt call. Don't answer. The ideal phone call takes place between 10:00AM and 10:30AM and it includes at least one verse of The Birthday Song.
THEY GIVE YOU AN ACTUAL GREETING CARD: This is the winner. This is how much I care about you. I actually took the time to buy you a birthday card and make sure you get it. If you're writing thank you notes, you might want to write mine first. I'm just sayin'.
THEY HAND WRITE YOU A LETTER ON COLLEGE RULED BINDER PAPER: This would be the most caring person in the world- if you were in the 4th grade. But since you're not, this is weird and to be honest, a little creepy. This person has the potential to be a stalker. Be careful. Seriously."
We fulfill online orders Monday through Friday within 48 hours of receiving the order. (Assuming all items are in stock and available for immediate delivery.)
Orders will be shipped via USPS, FedEx, or UPS and should arrive within 3-5 business days, unless otherwise stipulated.